Nikita Hand has spoken publicly about the lasting effects of the sexual assault and court case involving Conor McGregor, saying she still experiences severe panic attacks and anxiety. Her comments highlight the long-term impact trauma can have on survivors, even after a legal case has concluded.
What happened to Nikita Hand?
Hand said she continues to live with the effects of an assault that took place in Dublin in December 2018. In November 2024, a High Court jury found that McGregor had assaulted her at the Beacon Hotel and awarded her €250,000 in damages.
McGregor appealed the decision, but the Court of Appeal dismissed his appeal in July 2025. Hand has since described the legal process, public scrutiny and online abuse as deeply distressing.
Speaking on the Brendan O’Connor Show on RTÉ Radio 1, she said panic attacks can last for hours. She described feeling as though a room is closing in, experiencing intense shaking and struggling to breathe.
Latest Irish News: Hand describes ongoing mental health impact
Hand said the consequences of the assault extended beyond the courtroom. She described a deterioration in her mental health and said she began drinking every night as a way of numbing the pain. She also said she became afraid in her own home.
Her account demonstrates that recovery from trauma is not necessarily linear. Although Hand said she is now better equipped to manage panic attacks, she continues to live with anxiety and post-traumatic stress.
She said the experience changed her sense of identity. Before the assault, she described herself as confident and comfortable with her appearance. Afterwards, she felt that she had lost a significant part of her life and had to learn how to accept “the new Nikita”.
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Threats and scrutiny during the court case
Hand said threats and intense scrutiny affected both her and her family. The case also followed a serious incident at her home, where a group of masked men broke in and stabbed her partner in June 2023. She later moved from the property.
She said she still receives threatening and abusive direct messages, including comments about her appearance. At the same time, she has received messages of support, which she said help her focus on positive responses rather than online hostility.
The experience underlines the risks faced by people involved in high-profile legal proceedings, particularly when social media exposes survivors to harassment and abuse.
Why Hand says there is no “perfect victim”
Hand said she regretted coming forward at various points during the trial, describing the experience as frightening and extremely difficult. She said her daughter, Freya, who was 13 at the time, gave her a reason to continue.
She wanted her daughter to see that it was possible to stand up for oneself. Hand also said she hopes girls and boys can grow up in a society where people feel able to speak about harm done to them.
Her forthcoming book, Not The Perfect Victim: My Fight for Survival, Truth and Justice, explores her experience. Hand said the title reflects the reality that survivors do not need to fit an idealised image to be believed or supported.
Support from family and the Dublin Rape Crisis Centre
Hand credited her partner Gary Foy, her family and the Dublin Rape Crisis Centre with helping her through the past several years. She stressed that support does not erase what happened, but can help someone continue the process of healing.
Hand recently gave birth to her second daughter, Alba, a name associated with a new beginning. She said her two daughters keep her going and that she feels fortunate to have them.
For anyone affected by sexual violence in Ireland, the Dublin Rape Crisis Centre provides confidential support through its national 24-hour helpline on 1800 77 88 88.
What happens next?
Hand’s book is due to be released on Tuesday. She said she hopes it will educate readers about consent and encourage survivors to seek help, regardless of the circumstances surrounding their experience.
Her comments are also likely to renew discussion about trauma-informed support, online harassment and the pressure placed on people who give evidence in high-profile cases. The legal proceedings have concluded, but Hand’s account makes clear that the personal effects continue.
Frequently asked questions
What did the High Court decide?
A High Court jury found in November 2024 that Conor McGregor had assaulted Nikita Hand at Dublin’s Beacon Hotel in December 2018. Hand was awarded €250,000 in damages.
Was the decision appealed?
Yes. McGregor appealed, but the Court of Appeal dismissed the appeal in July 2025.
What support is available in Ireland?
The Dublin Rape Crisis Centre’s national 24-hour helpline is available on 1800 77 88 88. Its services offer support to people affected by sexual violence.
Breaking News Ireland: a story about recovery as well as a verdict
Nikita Hand’s account shows why the end of a court case does not mark the end of trauma. Her continuing panic attacks, anxiety and PTSD reflect the long-term consequences survivors may face after violence and public scrutiny.
Her central message is that there is no perfect victim. The focus, she said, should remain on consent, support and ensuring that people can speak out without being judged for their past or how they respond to trauma.
